BlackDoctor.org contributing writer and sextpert Tyomi gets the conversation started about the need for more acceptance of sexual diversity in the Black community. It’s time we pull back the sheets…
I’m a sex and relationship writer and on average my day consists of searching the Internet for new developments in sexuality and gathering interesting topics to share with the masses about how to live out full and healthy sex lives. During my daily Web surfing, I often come across message threads heavily populated with “brothers and sisters” that appear enthusiastic about engaging in discussing topics about sexuality, but I am disappointed every time I read through the comments and become aware of people’s sexual knowledge. It makes me realize that I have much more work to do in bringing sexual awareness to the Black community as a whole.
There are a number of areas within sexuality that need to be remedied in our community, but the simplest thing we can do before moving into becoming better lovers is to expand our education about sexuality. In general, we all know experience to be the best teacher, but when one’s experiences have been completely vanilla (traditional) in expression one tends to negatively judge and dismiss sexual expressions that fall outside of their awareness.
It’s time for our community as a whole to embrace various forms of sexual expression to begin eliminating the negative stigma held against sexuality. At the essence of every person is sexuality, and some people choose to express themselves in ways that may not appeal to your personal desires. In the Black community most expressions of sexuality outside of the traditional are frowned upon, causing division and sometimes insecurities in those who seek to be embraced while living out a well-balanced sex life.
As a sex positive individual, I want to encourage people of color to examine how they approach the subject of sexuality. What attracts you? What turns you on? When you ignore opinions of the masses and listen to your inner voice, what calls out to you as something that would appeal to your sexuality? These are basic questions that need to be addressed to begin a journey towards sexual awareness.
So my challenge to every person of color is to become an expert of your own body, get in touch with what truly turns you on and seek out as much education about your desires as possible to begin living the sex life you deserve.