MKE Monday Juice

How to Support the LGBT Community

May 20, 2019 By MKE Community Journal Leave a Comment

Over the weekend a Dallas transgendered woman was found shot and killed. Although officials have yet to confirm whether this was a hate crime, months prior to this same woman was a victim. The transgender woman was brutally beaten by several men.

Upon her survival, she began to speak out more and more about the situation and shed light to anti-LGBT hate crimes happening in the LGBT community. Over the years the rate continues to increase, especially down south.

Aside from the transgender woman speaking out, just last year a 9-year-old boy killed himself because he and his sisters were consistently bullied at school after coming out to his mother. He hang himself, thinking that was the best way out. But my question to society is why?

Why does someone’s sexuality mean so much to people whom it doesn’t effect? Why does it anger and bring rage to people that find themselves to be homophobic? I think it’s important for people to begin to look at things in a different light.

Just because someone is interested in the same sex that doesn’t make them any less than a person. It doesn’t mean that they’re not a good person. It does not limit who a person will become it does nothing. It’s simply a sexual preference, that’s it.

After having a conversation this weekend on the MKE Table Talk episode, I realized there are three important factors that must take place in order for the world to begin to see the LGBT Community in a brighter light.

1. Understand We All Are Human

Being lesbian, gay, bisexual, or transgender does not limit a persons ability. It’s similar to race when you think about it. For years people have had many issues with accepting black people. Granted some still do, but if you line up ten people, Black, white, Asian, Hispanic, gay, straight, or even transgender, they all will bleed the same.

2. Accept Yourself First

Whether you are a part of the LGBT Community or not, your first step is to own and accept your own sexuality/identity. Many times people feel uncomfortable when they’re unsure. Therefore it’s necessary for you to be sure and also know that not every person interested in the same sex is interested in you.

3. Love Unconditionally

It’s important to support those that you know and don’t know when it comes to this topic. Many people of the LGBT Community experience terrible judgement from family, friends, loved ones, and more. Sometimes once a person comes out, they’re disowned or kicked out of the house having to experience homeless. The list goes on. But if more people would focus on loving people for people, the world would be a better place.

Respect is respect and love is love. These things should not be given upon contingencies. It should be unconditional. So tell someone you may have been treating unfairly that you love them. Apologize for passing judgement. Instead of making assumptions or cracking jokes, ask questions. The only way to do better is to know better. Make the change. Unity is everything because together we can do more.

-LaShawnda S. Wilkins (@speaklifeshawnie)

Police Officers Swarm Johnson’s Park

May 20, 2019 By MKE Community Journal Leave a Comment

Domestic violence is something that has become far too common in today’s relationships. I have seen this happen to friends or all ages, as well as family members. The majority of reported victims are females and in my experience, it has always gone on longer then first reported. Mental health continues to be at the forefront, as these conversations are rooted in the brokenness of people. Although it less reported, women are sometimes the aggressor as a result of the hurt in past experiences. I dated womanthat said in quote “I am about that domestic violence life,” and in more than one situation create a scenario in her head where I was cheating, and as a result attack me with weapons most of the time. The hurt is real and so are the victims, we can not celebrate the survivors of these situations enough.

On Saturday May 18^ththe district 3 police department hosted survivors of domestic violence cookout in Johnson’s park. Captain Norman (pictured with Officer Jones) has been a strong advocate in the community since taking the role as captain of the district 3 in 2018. There were officers playing games like bean bag toss, while interacting with residents and survivors alike. With all the attention on police involved killings and speed chases, the timing is crucial for community relationships to be mended.

“I never expected to be in front of these many officers without being arrested,” this was said by one man while he enjoyed a barbeques hotdog.

It was smiles all around as guest enjoyed free food and resources from various organizations. I look forward to covering and helping to plan their next event.

The Ayesha Curry Buzz

May 13, 2019 By MKE Community Journal Leave a Comment

So after seeing the latest episode of Jada Pinkett Smith’s Red Table Talk, the world is buzzing off of a simple statement that legendary Steph Curry’s wife made. “I have zero—this sounds weird—but, like, male attention. So then I begin to internalize it and I’m like, ‘Is something wrong with me?’ I don’t want it, but it would be nice to know that someone’s looking,” she says.

The conversation went on the discuss issues that women deal with upon marrying a successful man. The Curry guests and Jada talked about how they handle women throwing themselves at their husbands as well as dealing with the distance that comes in between do to the lifestyle that comes with their careers.

Some of the women at the table exposed their anxieties and their sense of insecurity at times. Yet, because of this one statement Ayesha Curry made, the world is in shambles calling Ayesha stupid, hinting that she’s promiscuous, and so much more.

Some people are saying she shouldn’t want that attention from any guy other than her husband. Some our saying she’s a cheater. But if we are being real, everyone has their issues.

Me, personally, I feel there was nothing out of like that she said. Ayesha was speaking from her heart and I know for a fact that many men and women have felt this way in the past. First off, she’s married to a celebrity, a professional basketball player, a community hero to some. This simply means the lifestyle they live is a bit different from your everyday people.

People who live life at this level may not see their significant other everyday. There could be weeks where they don’t see each other at all. That alone makes their marriage a different ball game. Sure, they may or may not get to chat everyday but being around one another is completely different.

So for Mrs. Curry to express how she was feeling was completely human. As a woman, she may indeed be at a place where her self esteem or confidence isn’t at an all time high, but that doesn’t make her stupid or disloyal or wrong for what she said.

I think we live in a generation where people are so eager to find a negative opinion about someone else, they forget to acknowledge and criticize themselves first. You can’t judge someone’s journey in some shoes that you haven’t walked in. I think this is a great time for people to dig in their own closets. Find out what secrets hold them back. What insecurities make you uneasy.

I think if you can’t find any insecurities in your own life, ask around. Ask your mom who was either married in the past, single, or divorced. Ask some successful married couples about insecurities that they’ve faced in the past. Just ask because these feelings that were expressed were completely normal.

As a whole, I believe we should begin to take more time out to evaluate ourselves instead of immediately forming opinions about people that we’ve never met, living lives that we’ve never lived. We should respect people’s vulnerabilities more importantly people’s honesty. It takes more people like Ayesha to speak out about raw feelings and emotions to make the world a better place. Someone out there just needs to know, they are not alone.

Dear Mommas

May 13, 2019 By MKE Community Journal Leave a Comment

To all the mothers living well, and the ones in the struggle

I want to thank you for your strength, making gold out of rubble

You keep us out of trouble even when we don’t listen

Until it all falls down now it’s your love that we missing

You always pay attention, even when we are wrong telling us to hold on urging us to be strong

And even when you’re alone because we so caught up self

You praying hard to our God to keep us safe to bring us all wealth

I could go on for 12, hours that is talking about how you keep a house with food and 6 kids

Always handle your biz so wise and so true

To all the mothers out there I appreciate and love you

You Are Not Alone

May 13, 2019 By MKE Community Journal Leave a Comment

Okay. So you have been giving life your all. You’ve been making the changes that you feel are necessary in order for you to feel better, look better, or even think better. You’ve been starving yourself of bad habits; even separating yourself from people that you feel might not have your best interests. Yet, something’s still wrong.

Every room you walk into makes you feel out of place. If you’re surrounded by a bunch of people you feel anxious, nervous, and uneasy. You feel attacked when others ask you questions. You find yourself taking everything the wrong way.

Every time something doesn’t work out as planned, you feel like a failure. Your intellect immediately tells you that you knew better so you feel stupid. You feel like you let everyone down, including yourself. But in reality it was a simple mistake or in fact a minor learning experience.

Guess what? You’re human. It’s okay to have these thoughts every now and then. Sometimes you taking failures so hard is because you actually care. Many people feel uncomfortable when they’re around a bunch of people. But that just shows you were out of comfort zone. Networking and meeting new people may not be the norm for you so of course you may feel uneasy. You may just feel like you let yourself down but that’s because you’re being so hard on yourself. Mistakes are just proof that you’re trying.

When you find yourself in a rut like this, you’re definitely due for some self loving and some mental relaxation. Over the weekend I had the opportunity to attend a community event where a bunch of women came together, sipped mimosas, and discussed their goals. It was put together by Steph Crosley.

Throughout the event women had an opportunity to express how they were feeling in regards to life and goal setting. We discussed mental and emotional barriers and gained motivation from everyone in the room. This was a place where women were allowed to be women— allowed to discuss strengths and struggles.

The conversations got deep and the deeper they got the more power was released from one woman to another. I mean it was truly therapeutic. It was a beautiful thing seeing women who love and want to help other women. It was powerful because as people began to share their stories, we began to see how we all are so much alike.

Knowing that you aren’t the only one carrying the emotions around that you have is empowering. I say that because it’s so easy to feel alone when your focused. It’s easy to feel alone when you have been through certain experiences. But when a group of women can come together and talk about real issues that they’re facing in hopes to grow and help someone, women can’t be stopped.

Attending events like this can really help when you find yourself in a place of struggle whether mentally, emotionally, spiritually, or physically. Connecting with the right people can honestly make you feel a lot better for yourself. It’s a feeling like no other. The more willing you become the greater you could potentially be.

So stop counting yourself out. Stop pointing out everything that doesn’t go as planned and instead begin to identify areas of improvement and move on. Don’t allow a room of people scare you because I’m that room are many people experiencing similar problems as you. Your failures are not the end of the world. And if you don’t know that, be courageous and start to surround yourself with powerful people who can poor positive feedback into your life, without judgement.

March Of The Pink Shirts

May 13, 2019 By MKE Community Journal Leave a Comment

According to Breastcancer.org 1out of 8 U.S. women be diagnosed with invasive breast cancer over their life time. That number accounts for approximately 12% of the population. My aunt fell into that category about 4 years ago, but after a long fight and prayer she is living without it. Not every has the same happy ending, and for them we fight and march!

On Saturday May 11, the Milwaukee summer site for entertainment Summer Fest grounds here in Milwaukee was vibrant for a different reason. People of all gender, color and creed united for a walk against breast cancer. “This is not a race” a representative of the Making Strides against Breast Cancer Milwaukee. The march is meant to honor survivors, and those lost their life to the disease.

Barre District Milwaukee led the warm ups as hundreds of attendees stretch their legs to get ready for the walk.

The energy was insane throughout the event as guest were reminded of those they walked for, I ray for long lives of all those are battling. Fight on!

Super Senior Host Youth Mental Health Summit

May 6, 2019 By MKE Community Journal Leave a Comment

Violence has plagued our city with the majority of deaths resulting in gun violence. Victims of all ages are leaving behind loved ones who in many instances are traumatized with no coping methods. May is mental health awareness month and contrary to popular belief, it is okay to be aware of your own mental health. Some hear those words and think “I am not crazy what do I have to be aware of.” Being aware of ones mental health is the same as your physical health, dental health etc. We must set examples of properly caring for ourselves, as the youth need to know the importance of that. Over the weekend one High School senior hosted a summit dedicated to the mental health and wellness of youth.

Erica Lofton, Vice President of the City of Milwaukee Youth Council, is only a senior in High School, but understands the importance of mental health. On Saturday May 4^thshe hosted the “Faces of Mental Health” youth health and wellness summit. Lofton who is also owns her own nonprofit Girls In Action INC, put on a marvelous event that featured vendors, performers and speakers. Of those was one influential woman Santana Leewho is the founder of ALL 4 KIDZ, an organization that focuses n youth in foster care system. Lee shared her experiences working with youth, as well as self care tips. The event was sponsored by P Taylor consulting in which Lofton also interns at. Milwaukee College Prep was a big supporter, in fact one of its students 8^thgrade youth influencer Nyemia Rodgers-Evans did a poem encouraging youth on topics like friendships.

Watch Video

The event was successful as youth were able to share their thoughts in a healthy environments, let us work to provide these environments at home.

The Faces of Black Therapists

May 6, 2019 By MKE Community Journal 3 Comments

“Stop crying you not sad” “why you not smiling” “why are you mad all the time, go to sleep” “you must be crazy or something” “therapy is for white people” These are some of the statements I have heard spoken to Africans Americans of all ages in regards to therapy. The stigma for years has been that seeking professional help is a sign of weakness, or insanity so we should “sleep it off” to avoid the attention. Not only is therapy not race specific, it is in no way an admittance of insanity. A Therapist can be sought after to deal with trauma that you might not know you experienced (i.e. death in the family, verbally abusive relationship). Often times we do not know how a situation has affected us and inadvertently create a mask. Individuals who want to talk to someone do not because the Therapist does not look like them. In the city of Milwaukee Black Therapist are not as scarce as one might think, and one Black Clinician made it her business to showcase them.

Kia Wilkinson- Holloway had an idea and she shared it with fellow clinicians Lakeia Jones-Spell, Arnitta Holliman, Hope Jackson and Thomasina Jenkins. The aforementioned women, who all own private practices as well supported Holloway in her desire to have a Black Therapist Photo shoot. The shoot took place on Sunday May 6^thwith photos done by Timothy Rickets. “I wanted to show the city that we are Black Therapist, and we are here and ready to help.” This was a statement from Holloway who also owns Imani Counseling Services LLC.The scene was beautiful one as I watched Clinicians of all ages both men and women, converse with each other as they awaited there turn to take pictures in the required black dress attire. I even heard jokes like “how she get a standup picture I want to look sassy too” and “let me grab a prop I want to stand.” This was a statement from Marrika Rodgers, a clinicianwho has been aggressively active in the community. The group showed professionalism perhaps just as important, their human side, they are people who have gone through life, therefore can relate to the struggles of our community.

Witnessing it inspired me to continue my education and become a Clinician… I hope it inspires someone who needs help to seek out a Therapist.

You Go Girl!

May 6, 2019 By MKE Community Journal Leave a Comment

When you think of women so many dope things come to mind. Women have so many amazing attributes. We, as women are super smart. We are driven. No matter the circumstances, when necessary we make things happen with or without help. We reproduce and raise kids. We love hard, although we can be a hand full. Nonetheless, sometimes we don’t get as much credit as deserved.

We work our butts off day in and day out and barely get recognition from anyone. Granted some things we do are mandatory, but it’s just about getting a little pat on the back at times. For instance, if you have kids, being a mother is your number one job. It’s something you’re supposed to do. It’s your duty but on the contrary, there are many people who have that same duty and choose not to step up to the plate.

Then you have those people who believe a woman “should be” doing things this way and “should be” doing things that way— neglecting the fact that all women weren’t built the same. Not every women was loved on or taken care of growing up. Some women literally have to make a way out of no way to survive. Some women weren’t as fortunate as others therefore lifestyles may differ but because of that, that shouldn’t make that woman any different from the next.

When I think of women, I think of the need of encouragement from other women. I met a young lady last week. She was 23, a mother of 3, adopted, had been homeless, and a stripper prior to her biological father finding her. She lived a super hard life in and out of shelters, dancing to make ends meet.

Meeting her was so exciting yet humbling for me. As tears ran down her eyes from her sharing her story, all I could think about is the strength that she has endured and the encouragement that I was dedicated to giving her. She was excited to start her life over again, granted she may be starting from level one she is choosing to start over again.

After encouraging her I thought to myself, women just don’t know how much we need each other. We need to compliment each other. We need to love and care for each other. We need to encourage one another and support as much as we can.

Instead of gossiping and pointing imperfections out about one another let’s find tiny ways to unite daily. No matter where we’re from, we can all learn from each other. But we can’t help and learn from each other if we can’t share our stories with one another or trust each other. We have to learn how to remove all judgement and dedicate ourselves to one another.

Women are like superheroes, no matter what obstacles come our way, we find a way to make things work. But what good do we do if we can’t fix the cape on the next Superwoman?

Rise and Shine

May 6, 2019 By MKE Community Journal Leave a Comment

Rise and shine. It’s time to get the kids off to school and go to work. Of course, this may be the last thing you want to do, but duty calls, right? The beginning of the week has arrived and it’s time to start it off the right way!

It’s Monday! Some people feel this is the toughest day of the week. They call themselves having the “Monday blues.” But you know what? This is the best Monday a person could ever have, you know why? Because as long as we’re breathing we have another chance at getting things right.

Yes, last week felt like a complete bummer. It seemed like everything that could have went wrong, went wrong. Granted it may have but what’s most important is that today is a new day.

Today, it’s super important to tell yourself you will not be defeated by the week. Tell yourself you are going to conquer all of your goals. Tell yourself that this week is yours. I mean it really is.

This week vow to stay positive; vow to take care of something that you’ve been procrastinating about. The glass is half full not half empty. Everything that goes wrong only makes you wiser. It’s just a learning experience. After all nobody is perfect.

Plan this week out and fill it with fun activities. Make time for you to relax. Plan a day with the kids. Get out of your typical routine and spice it up a bit. Go somewhere you haven’t been before. Find out what new businesses are open around the city. Go check them out. Monday’s go best when you know you have something fun to look forward to.

And I get it. You’re tired, you want to stay in bed, you need a day off, but when you begin to fill your week with things that you actually want to do, you’re going to feel a little more energized. A positive mindset is everything and what you do with your time is critical.

So, instead of feeling like woe is me. Take charge of this week. Kick this week’s butt! Keep knocking out those goals. Keep working hard. Reward yourself for all of your hard work. Have some fun with the kids. Treat yourself because you deserve it.

No matter what last week looked like, dedicate yourself to a better week. Expect the unexpected. Be proactive. Brake the cycle and win it all this week. After all, YOU have the power to do so. Plus, you were made for this.