Okay so you’re the nice guy/gal. You’re the one everyone comes to when they need help. You’re the one who says “yes” to everything someone asks you to do. You bend over backwards for others. You go out of your way. Sometimes you even overwhelm yourself on the count of trying to help others.
Great. It’s clear that you have a good heart. But what if I told you that good heart can turn bitter if you let it. Sometimes saying “yes” to everything and everybody becomes frustrating. It’s like always need you to do something for them.
The problem is, as you grow, this can truly heart your mental. It can damage your emotions and even begin to effect your physical health.
“But I don’t want people to think I’m a mean person,” you say. Well, what if I told you that you’re actually being mean to yourself? By saying yes to others you’re neglecting self boundaries. You’re putting others before yourself and while that sounds like a great thing to do, it’s imperative that you see yourself as an asset first.
Although you may think the people you help out would do the same for you, at times, you need to put that theory to the test. If you’re the person always saying yes to helping others, it’s highly likely that you’re also the person who never asks for anything. In your mind, you think saying “no” is being mean and no one’s going to like you.
Hear me out.
There’s people in this world that don’t like you now. But what if you found out that some people only stay connected to you because of what you can do for them. What if I told you that sometimes the things you help people with are things they would never help you with?
There’s people in your life that take advantage of you simply because they know that they can. While some don’t realize it, some people abuse the friend, family member, or mate that you are because you continue to leave room for them to do so.
I want you to take some time and think about this. Try a social experiment. Call those people that always ask you for things and act as if you need their help. See what the response is. You can even make it your business to say “no” to people for a week or two, even a month to see their reaction. This experience will be eye opening. You will find that you’ve been putting a lot of time and energy in places that don’t deserve it.
It’s kind of like starting a business. When you first start your business, many times the people who you expect to support you are the exact people who don’t. There’s something about making better decisions for yourself that pushes people away.
You deserve to treat yourself right. You deserve to feel good and not overwhelmed. You deserve to enjoy life. You don’t deserve to be walked over. Contrary to what you believe, if the people who ask you for things truly love you and are for you, they will respect your “no”. You just have to see for yourself.
So choose YOU.