One of the most precious gifts many people get to experience in life are children. They are a true present. Becoming a parent brings an indescribable joy that nothing else in this world can bring. How beautiful is it to see a replication of yourself right before your eyes? It’s astonishing.
Seeing the baby come out the womb and suddenly cry let’s you know just how much you’re life is about to change; but for the better, if you take it all in. Keeping a humble mind and knowing not everyone gets to have this experience is critical. That’s one of the many reasons working to be a good parent should be a priority.
Now when baby comes out, as a parent we learn our new duties of feeding the baby and changing pampers. We learn how to adjust our sleep schedules to accommodate theirs. We learn how to multitask—quickly. Although parenting is beautiful, it is also tough.
Kids grow quickly. Now there’s no such thing as a perfect parent, but there sure is a way to be a great mom or dad. This is the part where the work comes in. Granted you have to work to provide for the child. You also have to work to put yourself in a position to be there at there toughest moments, as they grow.
Growing up we’re you raised by a parent that you could talk to about nearly anything? Some of us did and some didn’t. Some of us had parents that did pretty good but the communication was off. Some may have been besties with us growing up. Some maybe didn’t do enough at all or did too much, in all honesty.
Now, there’s no cookie cutter for the proper way to raise a child, but here’s a few things to help you get closer to yours.
Never be too busy.
Never make a child feel like they’re in the way when they need you the most. Granted kids are a lot to handle, you should still make sure you’re making time for them. Kids are humans, just like our friends and family. They must be loved on and attended to. If you find yourself in a position where you don’t have the time to discuss something you’re child wants to talk about or show you, make the time. It doesn’t have to be right then and there, but don’t make it a habit to blow them off “for now”.
Choose your words.
Be aware of how you talk to your kid; the language; the tone. Although you’re the parent/adult here, be conscience of your word choice. Don’t just talk to your child any kind of way. Don’t talk AT your kids all day long. We get it, you’re the parent here, but if you aren’t careful of how you talk to your child, you can push them away. You can be inconsiderate of your choice of words and delivery and unintentionally push them away. Just think about it. If you’re constantly around someone who continually disrespects you, are you going to want to get close with that person? No. You would rather prefer more space.
Give your kid a kiss or a hug.
Touching is a love language and a communication tool. Showing affection goes a long way. It’s an exchange of energy. It also displays love and trust. It could even communicate safety—that everything will be okay. Don’t be too stand off-ish. Show the kids some love. They’re love every bit of it when it’s consistent.
Listen more than you talk.
As a parent, it’s easy to get the “because I said so” mindset. Yes your child should and must obey you, as a parent. However, sometimes you (the parent) needs to listen. Hear what your child has to say whether it’s good stuff or not. Listen to the words that are coming out of there mouth. Listen to the passion behind it. Hear their cries before the tears arrive. Respect them. Still point out the good and the bad but slow down on your delivery sometimes.
Give them space.
Whew chile, let’s be honest here, we ALL need space. You need space to be able to regroup, focus, and work on you because you can’t be amazing to someone else for too long without first being amazing to you. Take a breather sometimes. Get a baby sitter. Let them have some space. It gives them a sense of independence and gains trust. Space is healthy but not too much of it. Balance it all out. Even use a calendar or planner if needed.
While there’s many things we can do to develop a great relationship with our children this is just a few. Start there. Switch some things up. We all mess up sometimes and fall short. But you know what? As long as you wake up you have another chance at being a phenomenal parent.